i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
