i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
