I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I need to calm my uterus...
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
