If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Is it penis luge time yet?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
