i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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