I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
