This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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