dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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