then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
