He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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