Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize