That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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