Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
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