Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
