Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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