her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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