Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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