just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
why is half of my head shaved?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
