ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize
