wake up i wanna do it froggy style
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize