I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
