the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
