woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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