So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
