Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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