they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
