we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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