Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
