I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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