Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
