ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize
