Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
