She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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