Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
