When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
