I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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