and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
