Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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