I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
