I think scott just propositioned me for sex
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
