the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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