cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Just puked most of my soul out..
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
