i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
