I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
This baby is an asshole
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
