i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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