Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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