Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
