You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
