Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
