I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
